Blackbirdan online journal of literature and the artsFall 2019  Vol. 18 No. 2
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an online journal of literature and the arts
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back JOAN BARANOW

From This Distance
NYC Sept 11, 2001/Olympic Valley, CA

An ant clambers onto my sandal,
strikes out across my toe,
is joined by others like water

sucked through a straw.
Is it awe I want to feel?
Am I supposed to know

about these furry-edged leaves
whose berries are bluing?
To my left an aspen snapped

at the waist. Several here
have avalanched
as if with sappy brains

they’ve judged their own heft
and heaved over. We can’t be everywhere
though to touch a particle

alone in space
jars another. Even an eight-year-old
can see the empty swing

sway. But this is simple.
Explain instead the moth’s physics,
its unsteady flight

dipping and doubling
back with blind, frenetic tack
though it sees

with fifty more eyes
than ours. What am I asking?
The sun grows the shadows,

I’m tired of the strict music in my head,
“the wind’s entreaties,”
which are not the wind’s

but my own grief
gasping its speech, poetry’s
hypnosis.

Distrust. Distrust.
Pick the bee’s legs of their pollen.
Thrust your hand down

a snake’s throat. Wheel yourself
into the operating room.
Watch how lovingly they scrape

the bodies out. Cough up
something sick. Is this it?
What? Have we finished

gnawing our bones?
Have I?
An ant is dragging

a dead larva
three times its size toward me.
I know you know that

but I won’t stop the words.
They are beating out the—O—
briefest pilot light. Inferno.  


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